The New Reality

2010

This is Dementia

As I said, the new reality set in when we got home from Seattle.   Dad was still unhappy about moving out of the house, and angry I controlled his money.    In my head I understood this was dementia, but in my heart it hurt.

We were still dancing around the dementia, but it was getting easier and easier to mis-step.

When I look back at this picture, his hands are in an odd position.  Lewy already had his grip on Dad’s body.

The sisters realized he would need to move to a place where he would get more care.  He was angry and confused – now he loved his Villa “in the brush”.

Dad said, “When your mother was alive, we didn’t need help with medications.”

On another day, “When your mother was alive, we could make our own food.”   He could be obstinate and stubborn.

Housing Visits

We visited a nearby assisted living complex.   Dad did not like it because the tour guide talked to us, not him.  He may have had brain dysfunction, but our Dad was still in charge!

The Plaza

We visited several more places including “The Plaza”, located in the town where I lived.   He asked if he could bring his horse, the tour guide enthusiastically said “Yes, of course you can, Lee.”  She was smart, talking directly to Dad.

When she told him he could have meals with the other residents, he said “I don’t need meals, I get free food now!”   I asked, “Dad, how do you get free food?”  “From you girls of course,” and the sheepish smile and throaty chuckle still shone through.

We signed him up for a one bedroom apartment at The Plaza.

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